Participating in parenting coordination with your co-parent may not sound like something that you really want to do. However, unless one or both co-parents have unlimited funds and find ongoing conflict in the Court rewarding in some way, you and your co-parent eventually have to start doing the work of raising your children together after the separation even though you are no longer committed as a couple.

At some point all separating parents must face the difficult moment of telling the children that they will longer be living together under one roof as a family. It is important to consider timing, content and emotions of all family members when planning a joint meeting with all of the children.

In addition to working directly with the co-parents, the parenting coordinator may also serve as the manager of a treatment team which includes individual therapists for the children, individual therapists for the co-parents as well as, possibly, a reunification therapist who works with the family.

In the course of negotiating a Parenting Plan or Marital Settlement Agreement (“Agreement”) all of the holidays are usually discussed in turn and divided in some manner. Negotiating the holiday schedule can be a challenging part of divorce mediation. Giving some careful thought to preferences and potential areas for compromise beforehand can be helpful.

In recent years, there has been a movement towards shared parenting time schedules. This movement has been supported by the enactment of legal presumptions for 50/50 or joint custody arrangements. Common shared parenting schedules include: 2-2-5, 2-2-3, split week, and alternate week.

In Parenting Coordination trained professional mediates the conversations between co-parents who have difficulty communicating or complying with existing Agreements and Court Orders. Parenting Coordinators also serve as a resource outside the court system in the event that new conflicts and issues arise.

As co-parents, it is easy to get caught up in the game of “my time versus your time.” But in this nasty war for time at the co-parent level, often it is the child’s world that is trampled. A better approach is to strive to allow the child to have his or her world, despite the separation.

If you are separating and have children, you will follow one of several processes in order to set up your new arrangement. These include: informal agreement, collaborative law process, mediation and formal court process.